Tag Archives: emotion

winter blues


Winter, a lingering season, is a time to gather golden moments, embark upon a sentimental journey, and enjoy every idle hour.  

Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories…

If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant:
if we did not sometimes taste of adversity,
prosperity would not be so welcome.

Hello everyone! Hope you’re all doing well. It’s getting chillier here, time to hibernate. Having said that, this time of the year is the most festive in England, we’ve been out and about a lot of late. Joining in all the festive fayres to keep our winter spirits up. You have to somehow, especially with young children. I need to create as many happy memories for them as my parents have done for me! I have posted many photos on my Instagram, so less of that here. I now find posting photos here a bit tedious to be honest, takes up a lot of time for sure! But one or two doesn’t matter I suppose. So as you’re aware my family and I are still around! As you know, this time of year usually makes me extra melancholy. The weather does get to you, especially the lack of bright sunshine and shorter days (dusk around 4 p.m right now). But it’s kind of nice in a way, time to reflect in front of the fireplace, curled up under a soft blanket with a cuppa tea. All the heartaches of the world can just stay outside with the cold. Adele couldn’t have chosen a better time to release her latest album ’25’ either, lovely numbers to keep my winter blues intact. In the nicest way of course, melancholy but warm. Knowing that I’m happiest right now, Alhamdulillah. When you’re middle-aged like me, you get to look back upon your adolescent years, your 20s and your 30s, and be grateful for all the good times. And you learn from the mistakes you’ve made along the way, as painful as it might have been. You also realise the road less travelled which you took turned out to be the best thing you’ve ever done! Enough chattering, I’m going to bid farewell with my favourite from Adele, enjoy! ❤

me in nov

me by a giant Xmas tree, cold but warm!


my younger two with The Victorians!




special flower


Friends are the flowers in the garden of life,

Beginning with one seed of trust, 

Nurtured with laughter and tears, 

Growing into loyalty and love.

Thank you my beloved friend M, for the beautiful friendship that's survived the thousands of miles between us. Thank you for visiting me without fail year after year, I feel truly honoured, cherished and loved. May that unique bond between our children from toddler-teenage years blossom as they grow older. You are my very first real friend in the West, who will always occupy a special corner in my heart. You are a remarkable flower in my garden of life. Thank you for being there.

Thank you my beloved friend M, for the beautiful friendship that’s survived the thousands of miles between us now. Thank you for visiting me without fail year after year; I feel truly honoured, cherished and loved. May that unique bond between our children from toddler-teenage years continue to blossom as they grow older. You were my very first real friend in the West, who will always occupy a special corner in my heart. You are a remarkable flower in my garden of life; so strong yet so gentle, just like your wonderful boys my son loves so very much. Thank you for being there, thank you for being in our lives.

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A bittersweet melody which reminds me of the special flower in my little garden, thank you for the rainbow of colours you’ve added to my life’s journey!

welcome 2015


Greetings everyone! Hope not too late to wish you all a Happy New Year! I know I have neglected my blog a bit, busy with one thing after another as usual. I now understand why many people choose social media platforms such as Facebook/Instagram for their latest life updates, a much quicker personal gratification! But I still prefer to blog, it is much more intimate, having my own little space in the cyber world. I can take my time, there is no rush, I am not really counting how many ‘likes’ I receive for each post (though I appreciate them all the same). Nor am I competing to be in the limelight. My blog allows me to share my ups and downs in life when I feel like it, it enables me to understand another piece of myself as I go along. I get the chance to ponder upon my thoughts and feelings, I try to analyse the different emotions within me at various stages of my life.

Like many of you out there, I sometimes feel on top of the world, other times I feel like I can never smile again. I try to make sense of what being human is all about. This life is too short you know, you have to find meaning and peace in your brief existence. Otherwise it’s all pointless really. All the horror, injustice and misery of this world will bog you down. I do not know what is in store for me in 2015, but I shall take one day at a time and focus on the present. I cannot change the past, nor can I predict the future, but the present beckons to me with open arms. Welcome 2015, may God give me the strength to cope with whatever comes my way this year. Life is an ocean, I shall continue to sail on the calm waters and ride through the rough storms till my last breath. Love and faith shall see me through, love and faith will keep me going, InshaAllah (God Willing)…

What is life after all, without love and faith?

Wishing everyone

hubby and I, wishing everyone a good year ahead! thank you for reading my blog!

my mother

Mother's Day wish from my dear old friend

Mother’s Day wish from my dear old friend who inspired this post

my beloved mom with my dearest sisters

my beloved mother with my dearest sisters on Mother’s Day in Malaysia

I woke up to a lazy Sunday morning seeing my beloved family on my Whatsapp message, it made me very happy indeed. My sisters had taken our dearest mother to a high tea buffet at a hotel back in my homeland, in conjunction with Mother’s Day (celebrated in March in England). How I wish I could have been there with them of course. Our mother deserves the best, we can never repay her for all that she’s done for us. That is why my sisters go all out to make her feel wonderful whenever there’s an opportunity to do so, such as on this special day. My mother is in her 7th decade now, she may have slowed down a bit due to her age but in my mind and heart she’s still the strong mother I’ve always known. I still see her in her teacher mode, her profession during her working life. She taught us from the day we were born, we continue to learn from her today. She’s always been there for us, her love knows no boundaries.

Now my 4 children gets a dose of her affection too, my only regret is that we are 6,500 miles away. As the eldest, I feel that I’m the most distant from her, both emotionally and geographically. I was the one she was the most strict with, we grew further apart when I went away to boarding school at the tender age of 13. But deep down inside I know she loves me very much, as I do her. I may not be able to say “I love you mom” as easily as my younger sisters, I may not be able to hug her and say “thank you mom for everything that you’ve done for me”, but I love her heaps nonetheless. I feel that I can relate to her more now than ever before, since I became a mother myself 14 years ago. I understand her feelings and emotions better, I now view things from her eyes. I’m grateful to have her in my life, from the day I was born to date. I pray she continues to have good health, faith and well-being, I pray for her happiness and contentment always. Happy Mother’s Day mama, I love you so very much… ❤


my beloved mother (centre) cutting the Mother’s Day cake with the other moms at the hotel

This gentle melody reminds me of my mom; the beautiful woman who has raised my sisters and I the best way she knew how, the light of my father’s life, lovely, never never change, coz we love you…Wishing all mothers a Happy Mother’s Day!


summer dreams

our hired fishing boat, Dorset, 2006

our hired fishing boat, Dorset, Summer 2006

I long for you oh bright sunshine

I long for you oh clear blue skies

I long to be in the red boat out to sea

I long to be in the aquamarine waters

I long to shake my winter blues away

I long for the wintry months to leave me

I long to be out there again

I long to be jolly in the sun!

(from the heart of Hibiscus Rosa Noor)